The Product v2.0 and Can You Find it Downtown?

Those who really know me well know that Thursday night is my “beauty night”. Dubious though I may be of the results of this weekly ritual, still I persist. Facial scrubs and minty facial masks, specialized foot care meant to mimic a real pedicure, application of Vitamin E oil to nails and cuticles, etc. etc… I know I’m a day early talking about this but in anticipation of another Thursday spent touching-up and spackling myself I am relaying my situation. Have you ever found a product that you cannot live without, one that you have used for years; a Product so magical that you would look like a totally different person if you did not use it daily? Then one morning you wake up and discover that The Product has been discontinued. Yes, the manufacturer has decided that they will no longer make The Product. They have no idea how much they have impacted your life by this reckless move. You see that The Product is no longer available online, but you’re sure they will be re-stocking it soon so you give them a ring to confirm that is the case. You reach a cheerful person in customer service and inquire as to when The Product will be available again. They politely ask you to hold and return a few moments later and utter the phrase, “That item has been discontinued.” You reel back a bit, steady yourself and ask them to please re-check that information which they do and then tell you with absolute certainty that The Product has indeed been discontinued. You feebly ask something like, “do you have a similar product?” to which the reply is “No ma’am, I’m sorry.” You hang up the phone wondering what your next move will be.

I know all too well how this goes as this has been my situation for four long months. C.O. Bigelow’s Extra Light Face Lotion was The Product (ELFL). I have no idea why this lotion worked so well for me but it did for many years and I saw no end in sight until this past April when I got the bad news. What’s the big deal, it’s just face lotion, right? Wrong, oh how wrong. The mere thought of putting lotion on my face was something I would never even have dreamed of at a point in time. Every time I tried a lotion, and friends I’ve tried them all, my face would become an oil slick of disastrous proportions, the results of which were too grisly to describe on such a public forum. I’ll spare you. Suffice it to say when at last I found ELFL my skin looked radiant, healthy and balanced for the first time ever. And I carried on using the ELFL, all the while never knowing the sands of the hourglass were running out on my facial happiness. So, for four months I’ve tried everything manufactured on earth in the face lotion category. I’ve spent hundreds of dollars on the full range of what the world of cosmetics has to offer - oil free, all natural, with spf, without spf, mattifying, moisturizing, hydrating, day cream, night cream, gels, sensitive skin, oily skin, combination skin, and on and on. The naming of these lotions are mind blowing and baffling and there is no end to the descriptors: “ultra calming daily moisturizer, SPF15”, “healthy skin anti-wrinkle cream”, “dramatically different moisturizing gel”, “UV defense regenerating lotion”, “deep hydration regenerating cream” and such. It’s ridiculous, the marketing for this stuff is over the top.

Finally, I found The Product v2.0 just this week. It’s by Origins and it’s simply called “Zero Oil”. Thank God in heaven. Downtown is woefully lacking in the cosmetics department. There’s Walgreens but finding something life changing may not happen there. Delphinium is the nicer place where you may find your next best thing as they are the only shop downtown to carry a few special items. I can’t think of anywhere else. There used to be a Merle Norman in the Peabody but MN always reminds me of coral colored shimmery lipstick and these earrings:

They always carried these mesh earrings with matching bracelets and necklaces, of course.